A time to reflect

The nice thing about retirement is that there is time to reflect; to put life into perspective. So to assist this I went to the zoo and had what alcoholics refer to as "a moment of clarity".



I know exactly how you feel, chief



The void stares back! And apparently makes obscene gestures too.

Retirement: Day 3

Today I went and signed up for work with a staffing firm. I've had enough of unemployment. By day two I found myself staring into the void, and yes the void indeed stares back.



I have been listening to Burzum, reading Kafka, and staring into the void as a primer for retirement. What does that lead to? Me worrying about overcoats.

If no jobs turn up soon, I fear that the madness will begin to consume me. Also, I haven't yet gotten my coat. For a while I was searching online desperately for the perfect one. A greatcoat would be perfect.



This Belgian army greatcoat is almost perfect. Warm, distinguished, and less than 100 bucks. But it isn't black.



This Soviet navy greatcoat is almost perfect, but 245 dollars.

I almost got a Navy bridgecoat, but they aren't quite long enough. Close, oh so close, and cheap. Plus those have epaulets, which are awesome. So yes, this is what one does with too much time. I will probably have to settle with a London Fog from the Burlington Coat Factory, but that saddens me because the lapels are so puny. We must have large lapels, and double breasted. Yes, we must. We know you trixies are wanting our double breasted precious, yes. We know you wants our big lapels, yesses. Yes. Soon, my precious, sssoooon!




Again, sooo close. And hopefully I wouldn't look like a child molester wearing it, as this guy certainly does. Maybe it is the mustache?

Retirement Countdown: 4 days

That's right folks, I have 4 days until retirement. I'm going through the checklist now. I've finally picked a severance whiskey: Tyrconnell. No overcoat yet, but there is still time. I also have an official unemployment movie picked out. Can you guess which one?



This is what happens when you're not economically viable!

Retirement Countdown: 18 days

I'll be retired in 18 days. I've got my Old Overcoat rye whiskey. But I still haven't decided on the Irish Whiskey. Ohhh, decisions decisions.