Sunday, April 19, 2009

Fear and self-loathing in Madvegas

An old buddy of mine is getting married in Belize in a few days. I was invited, but declined because it was going to cost quite a lot in airfare alone, and I was about to lose my job. In hindsight, this was stupid thinking. This is a once in a lifetime trip and I was a fool to not take it. It is too late to change my mind, because I don't have a passport and it takes weeks to get one.

Learn from this mistake.

Monday I am setting up a job interview, even though I am already gainfully employed. I have a bad feeling about the new job I have and was pining for a different job all week when all of a sudden I received 2 phone calls on Friday around quittin' time for new jobs. So I will probably burn a few bridges starting tomorrow and maybe have an even better job. Or maybe the same lame job. Or maybe no job at all. Such is life.


This sort of thing makes me blue

But, as always, there is a level of fear and paranoia in this venture. I want to dump this job for a better job. But I don't want to dump this job if the other job doesn't pan out. This job juggling I call threading the needle. This is the American dream: dicking over your old crappy job for a new crappy job. That and Russian mail-order brides.

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